Quiet Scares Me

I don’t like the quiet. I don’t like the stillness. I suppose it’s because it makes my own thoughts and voices become louder and unbearable. I don’t like what my “inner voice” says sometimes.

It tells me to be insecure, be ashamed, feel guilty, feel dirty, be mad for the horrid things that not only I myself have done, but for the things that people I have entrusted have done to break me.

That’s why I’ve been silent. I’ve been busy trying to muffle the yelling and bad breath of my inner self.

Lately I’ve noticed bouts of feelings that I haven’t felt in years..

Worthiness.

Wholeness.

Acceptance… of myself.

“Popularity breeds contempt.”

-some dude

Not that I was ever that popular- far from it.

I was certainly liked by my people though. That’s what matters. Getting to the root of who we are, and coming to a place where we are settled with it.

Here’s to all the others out there looking for your lost mojo today. Whether it’s self-guilt riddling you, or the mark of a scar left by another.. don’t stay down for the count. Get back up, and when you do- don’t be surprised when some try to hinder your success of standing on your own. There will always be haters tossing objects at you from the cheap seats.

And tell any of those people that may have quieted you because of your shine to go suck a lemon. Get your voice back. Even if it squeaks at first- it will get stronger. Just like any other muscle, that voice (box) can learn to strengthen with steady practice.

Polish it. Nurture it. It will come in due time.

Happy Friday Friends

Posted by

Life, Infidelity, and Thereafter

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s