The Unpopular Opinion Of Hope

“Sometimes you win some, sometimes you lose some………… It’s easy to see when there’s nothing to bring me down. But what will I say, when I’m held to the flame, like I am right now? I know You’re able, and I know You can, save through the fire with Your mighty hand But even if […]

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A Confession, An Apology

I wish I could attest that I’ve always walked with integrity as the Brene Brown quote says, but I digress. It’s easy to say you would NEVER do something, until you do that something. I don’t fit exactly into any category squarely when it comes to the infidelity clicks. Yes, I was betrayed. Yes, my […]

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The Passing of D-day Anniversary #1

The memories that seem to have scarred most of all are the ones from the unearthing of information and the disclosure period itself. It’s everything surrounding that time frame. It’s the music heard, the chill in the air that began to envelope us. So many seemingly minuscule details that were never anticipated to have a […]

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Quiet Scares Me

I don’t like the quiet. I don’t like the stillness. I suppose it’s because it makes my own thoughts and voices become louder and unbearable. I don’t like what my “inner voice” says sometimes. It tells me to be insecure, be ashamed, feel guilty, feel dirty, be mad for the horrid things that not only […]

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Another Day

Another day of struggle. Another day of triggers. Another day of carefully layered mascara. Another day with an hour spent on careful preparation of my appearance. Then I recant -wipe away half of my art. (I do not want to appear to be trying too hard) So, it’s just Another wasted effort. Re-entrance to the […]

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Grieving those alive

I know about grief – at least, I thought I did. For several years I worked in a level one trauma unit – which means that when a hospital couldn’t care for a patient because they were too ‘broken’, they sent them to us to put back together. We cared for the sickest of the […]

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All things sensual, sexual

It’s everywhere. Sex sells. Why does every image in a western with that woman in the saloon – ready to take a cowboy up to a room stimulate me to feel so anxious? Oh yeah- that really happens..(maybe not like the western, but there certainly are brothels – true story) So we turn the channel […]

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Letting go of the ‘unletgoable’

Okay, so I just made up that word. I know there’s a real word (unforgivable) that would almost fit, but it just didn’t describe exactly what I’m trying to convey. Just like my daughter’s 2 year old daughter, currently screaming her head off in my presence because she doesn’t want to let go of her […]

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