The One Year Mark, The “B” Word, And The Hero Of This Story

Whether you make it happen solo, or together.. Of late, I’ve written several posts about anything other than directly relating to where my marriage stands. Discussing my own imperfections and guilt is not only cathartic, it’s something within MY CONTROL. I find a sense of relief, because I’m not dealing with the direct pain from […]

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A Confession, An Apology

I wish I could attest that I’ve always walked with integrity as the Brene Brown quote says, but I digress. It’s easy to say you would NEVER do something, until you do that something. I don’t fit exactly into any category squarely when it comes to the infidelity clicks. Yes, I was betrayed. Yes, my […]

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Quiet Scares Me

I don’t like the quiet. I don’t like the stillness. I suppose it’s because it makes my own thoughts and voices become louder and unbearable. I don’t like what my “inner voice” says sometimes. It tells me to be insecure, be ashamed, feel guilty, feel dirty, be mad for the horrid things that not only […]

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The Load Feels Slightly Lighter

I’m writing this with hesitation, for fear of having that other shoe drop, but at least for the last month I feel some sense of normalcy again. Attempting to explain the emotions that ebb and flow after infidelity disclosure is almost indescribable to someone who hasn’t experienced it. FINALLY I feel somewhat stable and have […]

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I Refused To Be A Prude – So I Offered Him Another Woman

You read that correctly. Years ago, approximately the 7 year itch mark, I refused to allow my marriage to become stale. I prided myself on not being a prude. I watched porn with my husband, I performed whenever I thought he desired, there even came a point that I offered a threesome. Yep. I truly, […]

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When Some ‘Things’ Don’t Work Themselves Out

For some reason I was reminded the other day of my of very early nursing days and one of my most unusual encounters with a patient. (Of course I will remain as vague as possible for anonymity purposes, but I think you’ll get the drift.) Once upon a time on a surgical unit of a […]

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Nice try, Ego.

So, this ego thing has been kept pretty well in check, until the other day. I was running to town when Demi Lavato’s ‘Sorry Not Sorry’ came on the radio. As soon as the beat started and I heard her sing, “Now I’m out here looking like revenge Feeling like a ten, the best I’ve […]

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